LIFE IN A PATRIARCHAL SOCIETY

Sometimes I wonder what this world would be like without women? How would it look like without their presence, smile and calmness?

Today what is happening in our country has forced me to ask these questions to myself. Why are women being exploited across the globe? In our country where people worship goddesses like Durga, Kali, Lakshmi, etc, women are being treated like commodities in today’s date. Women are considered to be the weaker sex simply because they are physically weaker than men. All the wrong things are done with women and then the explanation given for it is that they are girls that is why this happened with them. Even though we claim to be very modern, we are still living in a male-dominant society, where mostly women are dependent upon their fathers, brothers or husbands in some way or the other. Women are always overpowered by the men in their family. They are forced to obey their husband or father. Why this attitude? Do the men also always obey their wives? No, then why is it only women who should listen to men? Many women face domestic violence in their families. Their husbands, sons or other relatives beat them up everyday behind closed doors in order to maintain their ‘superiority’. Inspite of all this, the women still do not step out of their house and tell the world about their husband’s wrongdoings because few don’t want their family name to be spoilt, others give excuse of their children and remain quiet and some feel that it’s their husband’s right to beat them up.

Sexual assault has become very common in our country from past few years. Everyday we come across articles about girls being raped and then killed. Recently I read a newspaper article about a girl being raped in a moving train and then being hanged to death on a nearby tree. And obviously there’s the Delhi gangrape case which we are all aware of. This incident has forced the whole country to think and take some action before it gets too late. It’s because of the outrage of the whole nation and because the youth took to the streets that laws are being revised in our country and steps are being taken in order to have a proper implementation of these laws. What I’m talking about here is something that comes into public light through media but what about the sexual abuse which takes place within families? Many women, specially in rural areas are being raped everyday by their husbands and other relatives. In rural areas, women don’t even realize at times that raping is an offence, even if its the husband who is doing so. This is simply because of lack of awareness amongst women over there. Young girls who are 5-6 year old become victims of rape. Men do not think for a single second before committing such heinous crimes. I don’t think any girl feels safe while walking on a road alone. The thought of what might just happen to her the next minute scares her. And in case of being molested, girls don’t feel safe in going to the police station and lodging a complaint against the accused. In the past there have been cases where girls after being raped went to the police station where they were again raped by a policeman.

And why are girls blamed for these offences? We can’t blame women for all this and make statements like “girls wear provocative clothes, that’s why crime is increasing.” The girls have full right to wear what they wish to. A 2 year old does not get raped because of the kind of clothes she wears. We come across girls wearing salwar-kameez being raped, at the same time girls wearing one piece being raped. So the root cause of this is not westernization, it is rather our society’s decayed mentality.

Is there a problem with the kind of upbringing the children are getting that crime against women is increasing at a rapid rate? Our personality enhancement starts at home. So the parents should encourage equality in their family so that the son never feels that women are anywhere lesser than men and they can be dominated. The husband should treat his wife and other women in family with all respect because his son would learn from whatever he sees being practised around him. Proper education about law and rights should also be provided to women so that they are aware about the various offences and the punishments which exist for them.

Shouting slogans would not solely help in fighting against these crimes. Our thinking needs to undergo a change. People should be more proactive and think about the welfare of mankind. In the Nirbhaya case, no one came to help her while she lay on the road, naked for hours in the cold weather. On the busy road, definitely there would have been people who saw her lying at the corner of the road, but no one came to her rescue. That was probably due to the fear of getting engaged in police investigation or simply because no one bothered enough to help her. We need to do away with this attitude and start taking initiatives.

We should work together and do away with this patriarchal form of society which we are living in and take steps towards constructing an egalitarian one.