Surabhi Kapoor
Principal, Dosti School

Groping, pinching and fondling in public places is something most women have experienced. However, most of these cases go unreported – or simply ignored. The reason for ignoring such instances of sexual harassment is simple – an absolute nonexistence of a support system that will hear and take action against perpetrators – it comes down to the victim’s word against the accused. So, in the light of this how can such instances of sexual abuse and violence against women in India be stopped?
Women with special needs are sadly unaware of such advances, mostly taking it as routine – until it is too late. Girls, both normal and with special needs, need to be taught to identify the “wrong touch” both at home and in public places such as on trains, buses, railway stations, market places and in school. Educating them to deal with such instances as and when they occur may not completely do away with this evil, but it will definitely act as a deterrent. However, these women need a support system that includes social services, efficient policing, and a speedy judicial system that will hear such cases and hand down judgments in the shortest time possible. After all, justice delayed is justice denied!
When perpetrators of crimes against women are punished appropriately and in time, others will be deterred and crimes against women will reduce considerably.
Violence against the girl child and women with disabilities is not just about any kind of physical violence; violence includes negligence, denying them traditional roles such as marriage and motherhood, and of course emotional, mental and physical abuse.
In fact, such is the state of affairs in India that discrimination against the girl child begins even before birth – and at this stage the parents are not even aware of the physical development of the fetus, imagine their reaction if they knew the fetus were special!
Girls and women with disabilities should especially be taught to recognize “the wrong touch. They should be taught to react and report such incidents irrespective of the man (or woman) concerned. Sexual advancements towards women mostly involve known men. Sadly, in many cases it involves the men in the family, such as the fathers of the girls, brothers, uncles and even close family friends – the nature of their relationship with the victim does not absolve them of their crime, and Indian women should understand this without any doubt.
Mothers, sisters, aunts and colleagues, both at work and in school, should be made aware of the need to protect each other by vocalizing any incident of physical and mental abuse against women – especially those with special needs. They should be made aware of the support systems in place to deal with such cases and most of all, they should be made aware that they have a special place in an educated society that has no right to discriminate against women.
It is time to speak out, educate and protect each other against a growing menace that stems from within our sex – mothers unable to bring up their sons to respect womankind. A revolution has to begin with women because only women can end atrocities against themselves – right minded men can only support us.

Ananya Nagar

अस्मत

वो फटे दुप्पटे से

अपनी छाती छिपाए

कभी पूरी कभी आधी छिपाए

इधर उधर भागे

भूखे कुत्ते से सब उसको ताके

कोई चेहरे पे मारे हाथ

कोई करता उसके स्तनों पे वार

बिखरे बाल

बिगड़ा हाल

चार टूटी चूड़िया

सिन्दूर की बेतरतीब लकीरें

हाथों से वो आँखों के आंसू पोंछे

भूखे भेड़िये उसे पल पल नोचे

हर आहट पे वो अब भी घबराये

जो भी आँचल पाए छिप जाए

फटे दुप्पटे से ही वो खुद को ढाके

फिर भी अब तक उसकी रूह काँपे

चेहरे पे नाखून

चेहरे पे नाखून

उससे बहता खून

उसकी कहानी बतलाये

कौन है वो

कौन है वो

क्यों वो लजाये

YOGESH CHANDRA
A retired Banker and a proud father of a son and a daughter-inlaw ,and Grandfather of two sweet kids..a boy and a girl

As in case of many , I am also deeply anguished and disturbed about the recent unfortunate incidents happening in our country. Each day , it is a sad dawn when we see half the newspaper headlines , ridiculing us and jeering at our helplessness. What is repeatedly going wrong ? Where are we erring in bringing up our children ? These are the broad questions that agitate our mind…Here I wish to raise two important issues that may throw some light on possible solutions to these problems.
To my mind , there is an imperative need to brainstorm on two vital aspects of this malaise…
1. Is it not the time to redefine , the term “Values” , which we keep harping on that both sexes should follow…In fact , there are two sets of values , one for men and the other for women…and the set of values , made for women is much more stringent , which even talks about , how should they dress up, where should they go , and even how should they walk and whom should they talk or not talk to..and why should they study, when ,they think that their ultimate objective is to bear and rear children , prepare food and should be the last person to eat after everyone in the family has eaten..strange…why not eat together??? All these , shall I call them , parental recordings even in the so-called civilised world need to be redefined…
2. After such a crime is committed and the matter stands reported to law.., why should we just sit back and relax , saying that now law will take its own course…With all respect to our country’s legal system , why can’t we think of devising ways and means that the law takes a faster course and comes to conclusion within a given frame of time..Besides establishing fast track courts , is there not a need of making suitable amendments in the penal code and/ or criminal procedure to achieve justice expeditiously..Though I have never been a student of law, but I strongly feel that there is need for legal experts to sit together and think about it….as we all know that ‘Justice delayed is Justice denied’….

Shalini Chandra
Head Mistress, Junior School, Study Hall

The Nirbhaya tragedy has brought our girls and women into focus for all the wrong reasons ..”Give freedom to the girls to dress the way they want and go where they wish to and this is what will happen!”—-proclaim the fundamentalists .The so called progressive groups on the other hand are crying themselves hoarse demanding freedom for girls .I feel that if we really want to learn a lesson from this horrific crime , then we should all be asking just one question—how are we raising our boys?

We have to seriously rethink about our notions of ‘manly’ and ‘macho’ and stop accepting eve teasing and other obscene behaviour patterns in boys as ‘normal’ and ‘healthy’ .We should also take care that in the name of ‘Sanskaar’ , we must not teach them to treat girls as weak , insecure and needing protection .Parents don’t have to do things consciously to raise a boy well but following certain unwritten rules will go a long way in ensuring a healthy growth .A mother’s voice should never be stifled and she should have an equal say in the boy’s upbringing .Children of both sexes MUST play  and if possible , study together .Only then will the boys realise that the girls are equally capable , intelligent and fun to be with and not objects of desire .Parents and teachers have to watch their own language and behaviour carefully .Regular monitoring and counselling of teenaged boys will prevent them from succumbing to peer pressure .It sounds like a lot of effort but actually it requires just a change of our mindset . As a mother I appeal to all parents of boys to please give this a thought ?

SUPARNA CHATTERJEE
Study Hall School

In our country we like to believe in the Orwellian quote ”to see what is in front of one’s nose needs constant struggle”. Hence if a girl is violated or abused the mother lives in denial for a long time and fails to recognize the crime. She would not even disclose the ghastly act to others to protect the family’s honour. They fear being ostracized by society. In villages women are paraded naked, many are declared witches to deface them.

It is, also, a Herculian task to go and report the matter to the police. Questions asked by the male constables are more harassing than the act itself. The police stations do not have the required number of lady constables.

The judiciary is also not untouched by this sort of discrimination against women. There are very few women lawyers and judges in the courts. Comments made by judges about women lawyers are sexist and need to be monitored. The need of the hour is speedy justice which can give confidence to women. Justice Verma’s report, on rape, within a month is a ray of hope.

Let us understand things in their perspective.

Violence against women have gone up. This is not only because of the low status of women. Literacy rates amongst them are low and hence they are not aware of their rights. Currently more women go out to work and a change is witnessed in society. They are constantly under a microscopic observation of their male counterparts and need to prove themselves over and over again. Women get pushed and groped in private buses. This seems normal to most. What the men would not like to acknowledge is that even a light touch, verbal abuse or constant gaze is also a form of abuse.

What is violence?

It is an act of aggression. So there is a perpetrator and a victim involved in the act. Violence itself can be classified as two types subjective ( perpetrators of violence) which includes acts of assault, murder or even terror and objective (violence inherent to the system), which includes the functioning of our political and economic systems.  Slavoj Zizek.

What causes violence?

It is caused due to economic disparity in society. Lack of political will and globalization are the other causes of violence. Here subjective violence is related to objective violence and objectivity to subjectivity. This means the subject acts the way he acts due to the deep divisions that exist within our society – socially, politically and economically.

In the case of rape, the rapists can belong to a low strata income group (as we have seen in the case of Nirbhaya). They engaged in such a heinous act as a result of continuous repression and suppression. The perpetrators are a product of the ever increasing gap between the rich and the poor brought about by globalization, corruption and poor execution of government policy. The political system has failed to uplift their position. Society has failed them too. Hence the perpetrators can think of striking back.

We often engage in discussions and debates over subjective violence and fail to address the objective violence.

The only way of escaping this vicious circle is education and constant engagement with society. Our education policy needs revamping. Including gender education in our curriculum cannot be the only solution to the problem. Including spirituality could help. This may help us see women with respect. Let us not forget that this is the land where we believe

“yatr naryasto pojyantay, ramantay tatr devta”  [3/56]   Manusmriti.

(where women are provided place of honor, gods are pleased and reside there in that household)

Rekha Dhondiyal
Senior Teacher, Study Hall School

Why are women exploited all over the world? Also why does society in India seem so brutalized today? The recent Delhi rape case jolted us out of our slumber and awakened our collective conscience. The rage erupted like a tsunami and swept away centuries of indifference and drowned everyone in tears, sorrow and guilt. The whole nation hung their head in shame. They felt rape is not about sex. It is about man’s power and domination.  How and when it reared its ugly head and reached such monstrous proportions is something to think about.

The story goes that when first man and woman came into being, they lived as hunter and home maker. When the woman gave birth to a baby, the man got jealous because he couldn’t manufacture a baby whereas the weaker sex could.  Since that day he began controlling her and thus patriarchy was born.

When violence acts against women take place, society takes them as unfortunate incidents, only because they were not at the receiving end. Do we then proactively encourage maltreatment of women?  Of course, man is to blame but isn’t the woman also party to the crime by considering the male progeny as god? She thinks boys are more equal than girls, not her fault perhaps. She inherited this from her mother.

While changing the mindset is a wonderful objective, it’s not good enough. Firstly, it’s going to take decades to bring about a paradigm shift, we don’t have the time, can’t sacrifice any more women to such barbaric ways. The law has to help in punishing and deterring rape.  Punishment has to be given speedily.  Fast track courts would stop the- would-be rapists in their tacks! If a country can’t protect its women, half its population, it is not civilized.

Mothers should learn to treat daughters and sons alike.  When parents get dolls for the daughter and a truck for the son, they reinforce stereotypes. It would be heavenly if the mother made her son into a metro sexual, in touch with his feminine side. It would be nicer still, if she told him to sometimes prepare breakfast for all. She could tell the daughter to get fruits from the market. This way the both of them would grow up as equal beings capable of doing all the jobs equally well. She could make a rule that the two would be home before it got dark, not only the daughter. Training has to begin at home. Children are like a sponge, the first 7 years of their life they absorb and imbibe what they see in their home.

Victims of assault and rape have to be offered support while keeping their identity a secret and the rapists should be stigmatized. Social boycott might work if their face is splashed in all the papers and on TV channels. Why should they be allowed to cover their face?

Women should dress as they please, go wherever they want to.  Freedom is their birth right. But they must carry a pepper spray, learn taekwondo, boxing and hit them where it hurts most.  But they must also remember that discretion is the better part of valour. They don’t have to fear men but it is good to accept that perhaps they are physically stronger than women.